Yeah, you read that right! There’s no such thing as work/life balance. Let’s all go ahead and let that idea go - fade away like the more carefree days of our childhoods.
In reality there will always be a never ending list of to-do’s and requirements to achieve in a finite amount of time. Your job is to prioritize what’s most important at the time, given your limited resources.
So many people, especially living in this post pandemic era, are swiftly headed toward burnout, if they are not there already. You can readily see this phenomenon all across social media. People are eagerly seeking solutions to help them to better manage the seemingly never ending list of responsibilities placed in their laps. Society would have you to believe that if your are struggling to do it all, that you merely need to manage your time better - and if you’re like me, you have bought in to this unachievable notion, often at the risk of your own mental and physical wellbeing . I can’t tell you how many times I scroll through my feed and see a woman who appears to have it all together. I mean her house is spotless, she has a freshly done manicure, well rested with endless energy to focus on her career - all the while being a super mom and wife. And I don’t doubt that this is very much her reality, but often what she doesn’t tell you is she has help - or as I’d like to call it “affluence to afford ease”. I aspire to be her by the way, but give me bit to get there.
So what about the rest of us? What about the segment of the population that while not rich enough to hire an assistant to run our errands, yearns to get it all done and be present for our families?
Here are a few practical mindset shifts that can help:
Acceptance.
Take a step back from the daily hustle of life to accept you can’t do it all - or at least not all the time. Release yourself from the condemnation that somehow if you were to be more, insert your adjective, you could do it all.
Embrace the full plate theory.
The full plate theory is simply the acknowledgement that you can only pile so much on your plate before it all comes tumbling down. Embracing this theory should be more about having the flexibility to get things done in your professional life, while still having the time and energy to enjoy your personal life. One day may require that you log into work early so that the following day you can feel comfortable leaving work early to attend your daughter’s dance recital. Another day could look like after completing your must do items, you only have time to clean the main living areas of your home.
Remember your why.
In all this managing of every day life, remember what it is all for - the lists, to-do’s, aspirational goals, the career - it’s all to support the life you want to achieve. It’s about the legacy you want to leave, the smile on your son’s face seeing you in the crowd at his football game. Have periodic checkins with your self or your spouse to make sure you are on the right path - course correct where needed.
Set the appropriate boundaries at work.
Take your vacation days and allow yourself to unplug - the work will be there when you get back. Remember, the time that you put in at work is done in exchange for pay, that helps facilitate the life you want to lead. Being passionate about your work is amazing but remember it is not the only thing. Note to self here, the place won’t burn down while you’re gone.
Above all, allow yourself grace that this season may not look like the last or the one to come. Ask for help. Lean on your support system. There will likely never be a 50/50 balance of career and life, that’s ok, but we can set realistic expectations for ourselves in order to thrive.
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